Recently we've hosted retreats for our seminarians to share the table, fellowship, and worship together. I make sure we laugh, sing, and play games, but we also discuss some of the difficulties of ministry. Pastors are in the people business, which means things can get heavy. The weight is what makes it meaningful (!), but it's also what makes it heavy.
Like everyone else, many pastors are struggling in this season. The reasons are varied, but the struggle is real. It is real, and most usually it is borne silently.
October is Pastor Appreciation month, and whether your pastor is walking on sunshine or struggling mightily, I encourage you to reach out. Pastor Appreciation month is a time set aside for intentional encouragement of your pastoral staff. Here are a few ideas friends and I have discussed. Can you try one of these this October?
- Give your pastor TWO additional Sundays off between now and the end of the year. Tell her you expect her to be gone from Friday until the following Wednesday. THIS IS IN ADDITION TO HER VACATION DAYS.
- Consider giving him all fifth Sundays off in 2023 to worship elsewhere. Yes, pastors can worship while leading, but our mind wheels are also spinning. We hope the visitor who walked in during the opening prayer will be welcomed (but not weirdly). When we step into the pulpit to preach, we look you in the eyes and remember your struggles, your marital issues, your worries. This is all natural and we're grateful; however, the gift of fifth Sundays to be led in worship is incredibly kind.
- Mail her a note with specific encouragement.
- Discover what he likes to do for fun and gift him something in that realm. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but no pastor needs any more scripture figurines or prints. What are her hobbies? Baseball? Give her tickets to a game. Reading? Give him a gift card to a local book store. Coffee? Treat her to your favorite blend. Discover what she likes to do and go in that direction. It needn't be elaborate.
- When you are frustrated with a leadership decision he has made, call him. Don't email, don't text: Call. Speak to him directly and as soon as possible. Emails and texts with the words "We need to talk" keep us up all night.
- Invite your pastor to your house for dinner. If you're not a cook, invite her out to dinner with you and your family and/or friends. Try your best not to talk about church things for that evening.
These are just a few ideas, which may or may not work in your context. I double dog dare you to try one, or come up with some of your own!
