Snakes

We are not pals.

I think it's the way they travel slithering right, left, right, left ad infinitum.  You never know how long it will take them to reach their destination.  The destination is my legs and they want to kill me or at least lick me with their lanyard-like tongue.

But on the 4th of July I make an exception.  I appreciate fireworks like the next person Katy Perry, but my favorite tradition is snakes.  Snakes come in a tiny box and look like tic-tacs.  (Do not eat them.)  You simply put a snake on the ground and light it on fire.  It grows to be a foot long black ash thing in a matter of seconds.  No sparks.  No frills.  No explosions.  Just a lovely black ash snake that gets soot all over your person:  It's wonderful.

Last year I went to the fireworks booth and told them I wanted to buy a box of snakes.  "That'll be $1.00."  I was living large that day and bought two.  When I was a girl they were only black, but not they come in a rainbow of colors.  I took them home and grew a family of snakes.

I searched for a picture of snakes, but that search yielded terrifying pictures of actual snakes so you'll have to look for yourself.

Happy 4th of July!  Enjoy your day.